UK immigration Test

Before granting you Citizenship to the United Kingdom, you must first pass this British Citizenship test.

Question 1:

– The Premier League is the showcase of which English popular sport?

– Diving.

– Correct. What is Britains most popular pastime?

– Queuing.

– Name the area where the highest British population density is?

– Tenerife.

– What is the current sterling conversion rate?

– About 1 goal in every 10 games.

– England won the world cup in 1966 beating West Germany.

– Was that a question?

– No, I just wanted to remind you. What is Scotland’s national dish?- Deep-fried Mars bar.

– When was the war of the Roses?

– Last Christmas when Cadbury’s reduced the size of the tin.

– International relations with Jordan were at an all-time low when?

– When she split with Peter Andre.

– Name the two great Manchester rivals?

– Liam and Noel.

– Pronounce this Welsh word:

– Caath Er Einn zeeeta Joan esss.

– Correct.

– Which tunnel separates Britain from mainland Europe?

– Tunnel Vision.

– What noise do politicians in the House of Commons make?

– Ughghghghgghghgghghghghghg

– Correct.

– What did England win in 1966 beating West Germany?

– The…World Cup?

– Correct! We beat them 4-2.

– Which British male was responsible for misleading the public over Brexit?

– The Daily Mail.

– And the last question… How would I… Get myself… An Irish Passport

– WHAT?!

Thank you very much for watching we’re Foil, Arms and Hog. We have a new video every Thursday. We are just back from the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. We had a great time for the whole month doing our brand new show. Big thank you to everyone who came along to see it. Really appreciate it. The new show is going to be on tour in the UK and Ireland next year, but if you want to catch us before then, we’re on in Galway, Cork and Wexford in the next month – October… October is the next month cause yeah… time progresses. Hey, you had a long month.

U.S Immigration

– Before granting you entry to the United States. We have a few simple questions. It’s just a formality.

– Okay.

– I’m actually Irish, myself.

– False.

– I know, I hadn’t started.

– Oh yeah, sorry.

– Question one, the United States is governed by two major parties. Uh, can you name them?

– The Gun Lobby and Big Tobacco.

– What is the name of America’s National Holiday?

– Black Friday.

– In what state is the city of Chicago?

– State of violence.

– What is America’s most dominant race?

– The Hundred Meter Butterfly.

– Quickfire round, finish these sentences. America is the greatest something in the world-

– … weapons exporter.

– Martin Luther King had a

– …tough time getting equal rights.

– Finally, the United States was founded in-

– …dubious circumstances surrounding land claims from Indigenous people.

– Welcome to America.

– Right.

Thank you very much for watching we’re Foil, Arms and Hug. And tomorrow we are going to America if we get through passport control. We’re doing gigs in Kansas and later in September our new show is coming to the Dublin Fringe and also Cork.


Related Articles

Cola Wars

Pepsi or Coke? We’re a hundred percent sure that this isn’t the first time you’ve been asked this question. After all, the rivalry between two…